Please Note:

Comments are welcome from any and all adoptees, but adoptees only. We are looking for substantial, meaty, thoughtful responses! One-worders, one-liners, emoticons will generally not be posted. Comments concerning the site are welcome in the Guest Registry. Thank you.

Why Asian Adoptees Need to Give a Shit about #BlackLivesMatter

I don’t remember the first time someone told me I was White. But I definitely remember the last. It was the summer of my junior year in college and I was a new student orientation leader. My university was diverse but mostly segregated, and this staff was about half White and half Black – plus […]

Identifying Wrong

All the buzz in social media right now is about an NAACP official who turns out to not be black as claimed.  She was born to a white couple and raised with black adoptees.  There have been other articles wondering whether or not being transracial is analogous to being transgendered.  And other articles about syndromes of delusion. Rachel […]

What is the obverse of “ghost” and “haunting”?

We’ve spoken about ghosts here and there. Lately, with reunion looming, I feel like I am haunting my own life, finding might-have-been footsteps; meeting could-have-been friends and, inch’allah, even family. But the metaphor is bothering me. A ghost is the immaterial which haunts the physical plane of the past, of what was. What is it […]

Adoption: Abide or die.

Over the years I’ve received much in the way of hateful missives, personal attacks, threats, libelous statements, etc. Some I reply to, some I ignore, some I seek legal counsel concerning. After a recent uptick in such communication, I realized something about the nature and sublimated message of them, which perhaps serves as a “message” […]

The Pentad of Adoption: Putting Fathers Back In The Picture

I received my original birth certificate today, which confirmed one of my better guesses (based on genetic testing and genealogical research) about the identity of my genetic mother. However, as I had been forewarned would likely be the case, the document contained no information about my father, since (as in many states) birth certificates in […]

Guilty as charged: Aiding and abetting adoption

In a previous post [link], Lucy explores the idea of abuse that can be stated is functional to adoptive parents withholding information from a child temporarily in their care. I didn’t want to hijack that post, so I’m hoping to expand on that here a bit. If we define the systemic displacement, dispossession, and disinheritance […]

Orphan Testing & the Search for An Origin

Having lately resorted to genetic testing to uncover my immediate genetic family, I confront therefore the panoply of folks, mostly not adopted, who are on a similar (but different) quest for their origin.[1] Compared to whatever conceits are at work in the efforts of committed and serious genealogists, the amateurish, armchair types—the ones who causally […]

Adoption’s Article of Bad Faith

Manifold disclosures about the unethical and immoral practices of those trafficking in human children now make clear the systemic, not merely idiosyncratically aberrant, character of those ethical and moral violations. [1] My adoptive parents paid for a white baby, but they didn’t get one—as 10.4% of my genetic heritage makes clear in its tracing back […]